Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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