Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
