1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
