I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
