Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
