I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
