Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think I have vodka in my lungs
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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