What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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