It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize