FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I party with great urgency now.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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