bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
honey bunches of taint.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
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