He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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