you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
