I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize