I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
