I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
My liver just broke up with me...
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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