i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
