Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
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