Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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