what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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