ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
