yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
