ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
