Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
