there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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