its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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