Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
