fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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