what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
