swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
