Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
