i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Randomize
