DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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