Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize