You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
