Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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