1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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