You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
