Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
You work out of a Hotel?
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
