So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
