1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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