Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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