is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
