Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
