I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
