so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
please come you make the beer taste better
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize