Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
She's not a foreskin expert like you
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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