I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
is that a dick in a sweater?
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
