Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
