she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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