What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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