You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
